“You should have told me,” shouted Wiley as he squirmed out of his bride’s passionate embrace.
He paced the bedroom, finally coming to a halt at the foot of the bed. “I can’t believe we’re on our honeymoon and you never told me this…this…” He threw his hands in the air and started walking the carpet [...]
“You should have told me,” shouted Wiley as he squirmed out of his bride’s passionate embrace.
He paced the bedroom, finally coming to a halt at the foot of the bed. “I can’t believe we’re on our honeymoon and you never told me this…this…” He threw his hands in the air and started walking the carpet again.
His virgin bride started crying, “I couldn’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I didn’t want you to look at me that way.”
“What way?”
“With disgust in your eyes instead of love. You always made me feel special, like I was the only creature on earth that you loved.”
“Well, creature is the right word,” screamed Wiley. “I was in love with the most beautiful woman on this crazy planet, then I finally get you into bed and…and…what the hell are you, anyway?”
“I’m an Ither-Orr from the planet Wonk.” Hot pink tears rained down her cheeks, puddling on the bedspread.
“Wonk? You’re an alien from a planet I never even heard of. Why the hell are you turning blue?”
“I always turn blue when I’m sad.”
“Well, just turn yourself back so you at least look human. How am I going to explain this to the High Council? I was sent here to marry an earthling so the bloodlines of Mars could mix with those of Earth. I’ve failed my mission completely. An Ither-Orr? Are you male or female. You can at least tell me that, can’t you?”
“Yes, of course, I’m an Ither-Orr. I can be whatever you want me to be.”
“Oh, Great Mars, I’ve married a creature who doesn’t even know what he or she is. I might as well kill myself before the Council does it for me.”
“Could we at least consummate our marriage before you’re exterminated?”
“Oh, hell,” said Wiley. “Why not? I’m doomed anyway. I landed on this planet confused, I might as well exit the same way.”
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Funny! Sucked me in and then spat me out laughing.
Haha going out with a bang, I love it.
I loved this. Very funny.
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Hah! Lots of fun, Sandra!